Army Surplus

In America, Army/Navy stores are a pretty common sight. They're pretty much the same all over, an American flag sharing space with a POW/MIA flag outside and racks and racks of used drab green military jackets, pants and miscellaneous home defense/survival gear that is all tended to by a slightly creepy older guy who after spending a lifetime risking his life for his country, is now awfully paranoid about its government.

Whaddya know, they have those in China too.

I never thought one could exist here, but a teammate found one about 15 subway stops over (ie, an eternity) and we went to check it out. Not so much Chinese military items, per se, although there were some standard issue haversacks and greatcoats and generic belts, pants, buttons, covers, some of which dated back to the Revolution. A lot of it was fake, made by companies that make shirts and jackets which look vaguely para military. A surprising number of it was American. On a lot of the jackets for sale in there I read US ARMY, or USMC along with rank and insignia. As I flipped through one rack, I was able to identify the insignia for 101st Airborne, 82 Airborne, US Navy Seabees, 7th Air Calvary and several more that I could not identify. Even more creepily, some still had last names sewn on. I'd really rather not think about how they got from the American serviceman wearing it to a shady Army surplus store halfway across Beijing.

My friend Nathan bought a greatcoat, which is similar to a trench coat but drab green with a fur lining around the neck and brass buttons with the communist star on them. Go watch a John Wayne movie where he's tackling the Koreans or the Vietnamese and you see a lot of them. He also bought a fur hat with large ear flaps, the kind you'd expect to see in Russia. He's now geared to go fight against the Imperialist Devils along the 38th Parallel or pose for propaganda depicting the same.

I picked up a really nice Army backpack, looks similar to the digital camouflage that the American military uses, only the flag on the back is different. I plan on using it to go to Europe here in a month.

Some things don't change

No matter where you are in the world...some things don't change. Mainly, woman and bugs.

Amber: Agh! There's a bug! Get him! Get him!
Dan:...uhm ok. *grabs something*
Amber: No, don't use that!
Dan: sigh..*grabs something else*
Amber: Throw him outside...he's a NICE bug!

Thanksgiving

Thursday, November 25 is just like any other workday for us. Our big feast will be on Saturday. Here is what I had for Thanksgiving dinner today.

Knock it off already....

With this new flair up in the Koreas between a poofy hair midget backed by a first world superpower and a technological giant (also backed by a first world superpower), things are getting interesting. So when that usually happens, Internet and communication is filtered much more heavily and sometimes even cut off. This latest spat gets serious and you don't see me on for a while, you know why. I'm pretty sure it will blow over in a week or so as I've lived in China just under 2 years and this is the fifth or sixth time these two have gotten into it, since I've been here.

I sooooooooo want to do this...

China North International Shooting Range

"If you've seen all the sites in Beijing and still want a fun day out doing something you've probably never done before then a trip to the shooting range is a great idea.There is a lot of primal enjoyment to be had from just blasting some deadly weapon at nothing in particular.

Good range of weapons from pistols, rifles, shotguns and snipers, to full-automatics and even heavy artillery. They've got all the famous ones, as the previous reviewer said - the AK, M16, magnum, desert eagle, AUG. The range includes lots of chinese-made weapons which the assistants are quite keen to show off to customers...

..The prices are usually about 4-8 kuai per bullet for the pistols, 8-15 for the rifles, 15 for the shotgun, and if you want to fire the anti-aircraft cannon then you have to 'shell' out over 1200kuai for 8 shells which you can 'blow' all at once. I just fired a clip on a chinese pistol (cheaper), a rifle, a sniper, and a few goes on the shotgun and it came to about 350 kuai per person altogether. It takes about an hour to get through all that.

They also have a paintballing course for when you get tired of shooting at stationary targets." [emphasis mine]

TeachOverseas recruiter

Henry Eu, the guy who does the recruitment for our summer staff via TeachOverseas is here. This makes anyone who has had to work in the summer immensely happy. Henry, having never been here before, would describe the conditions of our previous campus with the nice rooms and heavy tree forests, then when they would get here and find the cracked cement and wooden slat bunks, we would get the "But Henry said..." chorus. I don't know how many times a shocked summer staffer would stare at a squatty potty in disbelief and say "But Henry said that the rooms would be American style."

Ah yes, well since Henry said it, let me get out my magic wand and change everything to how you're used to, because you know, this trip of yours IS all about you. Sometimes I think Henry just made some things up to get people over here. So hopefully, with Henry being on campus today, the list of questions we get in the summer should dwindle.

"But Henry said you would be wheelchair accessible." Lady, this is China. OSHA would shut the entire country down if they could. There are parts of Beijing that are barely foot accessible, let alone wheelchair accessible. What part of "Great Wall" made you think it would be wheelchair friendly? Remember, what we view as a lawsuit waiting to happen, they look at as future entertainment.

"But Henry said the ATMs would work over here." They do...if you have a Chinese bank card. Or don't mind paying an eight dollar transaction fee from your bank which isn't used to dealing in yuan. Yet.

"But Henry said I would have my own room with my own shower." Haha. Sir, I am 26 years old. I have lived in a dorm style setting for the better part of ten years. Most of that time with a roommate and most of that time, shared a shower with a roommate and/or a whole floor and a peaceful, yet expansion minded colony of mold. I have been at TIP for almost two years and I just got my own room a bit ago. You're going to be here for all of six weeks, you can duke it out amongst each other on who goes to the showers first.

"But Henry said we'd be able to see (insert attraction here)." and we will certainly try our best to give you a cultural experience along with your service here. There should be time at the end of the session for you to do some sightseeing before you go back and we rejoice. But please understand, if you really wanted to see that, you should have talked to a travel agency, not an English volunteer service organization. You know, in all this time, I still haven't been to see the Summer Palace?

"Henry didn't say anything about (insert major cultural difference here)." Yeah, well...TIC

Warning: Pictures may be hazardous to worldview

This post is for my friend Eric Kiser who was asking about the openness of Christianity in China. Now keep in mind that every province is different and this only represents Beijing. These were all pictures I took with my cell phone out in public

Also, check out this link to China Daily. The number one English language newspaper in Beijing.

http://www.chinadaily.com.cn/cndy/2010-03/17/content_9600333.htm

entrance interviews

At the start of every session we have entrance interviews for the students to determine what level of English they have and what class to put them in. Students expect this and they're usually told by coworkers who have gone before about it, so they rehearse answers. You can usually tell a lot about how a session will go by these interviews and how many "rehearsed answers" you get. These questions are just to get to know a little about the students and gauge their English from their answers. Here's how most of mine went yesterday.

Hi, my name is Dan. It is nice to meet you.

Hi! I am (insertnamehere). Nice to meet you.

I want to ask you a few questions. Is that OK?

There are three people in my family. My husband, my son and I.

Uhm, OK, that's great. So are you a teacher?
Yes I am a teacher. My husband is a worker. There are three people in my family, my husband, and my ...

Right, yes. Three people. Got it. So what level do you teach? Primary school? Middle school? High school?

Primary school. Next year I will teach my son who is only 6 years old. There are three people in my..

Family. Yes. Three. Do you teach English in primary school?

Yes, I teach English to my son and husband. There are three

People in your family. I know. Let's switch gears here. If you could go anywhere in the world, where would you go?

I want to go to Beijing with my husband and my son.

Well you are IN Beijing right now. I mean, if you could visit any other country, where would you go.

To travel?

Yes, to travel.

I would not want to to travel anywhere. I want to stay home and take care of my husband and my son.

(under breath) *Dr. Phil, eat your heart out.* Ok, (insertnamehere) that is all the questions I have for you. It was nice to meet you. Have a nice day.

It's at this point she walks away a little confused because the question she rehearsed the hardest for wasn't asked. But she gave the answer anyway, she reminds herself, so she should be good. Now that that is over, the first place almost all of them go is outside to call their husband and son to update them.

What I Learned Today

-Beijing hairdressers are some of the most fashionable people in the country. They often look like extras on Rent or Rufio from Hook. I'm not kidding, google it.

-They have no idea what "highlights" mean. Even when shown a picture of highlights and the Chinese word for them. Apparently it's just easier to do a full dye job.

-I do not look like Leonardo DiCaprio

What I was going for....

What I got...



Well, at least I still have the stubble.

Chinese Census

China is undertaking a count of everyone in the country. This raises incredible logistics problems and actually more than a few are quite opposed to it. So in the twisted cul-de-sac that is my mind, it raises a few interesting questions/scenarios on how this will go...

-Could you say that those not wanting to be included have taken leave of their census?

-Question 13. How many children reside in your home?

two....one!
uh-oh....

-"Hey, another F. Yu lives here too! Third one this block."

-Who lives here?
Hu.
Yes, who?
Yes.
I mean the fellow's name.
Hu.
The fellow who lives here!
Hu is the person who lives here.
I'm asking YOU who lives here.
That's the man's name.
That's whose name?
Yes.

-Just how many more will be born by the time they're done?